"You raised me up"

Listening to Josh Groban makes me feel grateful of everything I have and I don’t have.

Josh Groban – You raised me up (an absolute thumbs-up)

The song carries a subjective meaning yet utterly meaningful to those who really listen. Some people say it’s a love song. Yes, it sure is. However, it’s not only for the lovebirds, I’ve heard this song at the church or during Praise & Worship. Everytime I listen to this song, my father’s image appeared in my memory lane and one particular event in my life.

There was once in UMS before I step into the exam hall, I was going through my notes for the last time before I saw something that sent me to tears. Josh groban was on the radio at the right timing as to welcome the incident which happened just next to my ride. It’s the father and his daughter on a motorbike. What I can recall is that, this father was sending his daughter for her exam. The father reached for her stuff at the front compartment and handed to her daughter before she bowed to kiss her father’s hand as to say thank you or goodbye.

Enough said, my friends. The love of a father – is something so wonderful and pure.

My remedy

Last night was the second night I had a very good sleep, maybe I occupied myself too much on the outdoor activities, which is very good indeed!! There was one night I was unable to sleep until 6 a.m and I was really worried if im getting insomnia. So I tried to turn my biological clock to a normal mode. -Sleep early and wake up at the right time-. Today was exceptional, the morning breeze made me so lazy to get up and i have to drag myself from the bed and start a day with a cup of coffee. Oh, was it coffee that I didn’t get to sleep at night?

I have to admit that I like to be alone, in fact my 'alone' time help me to think wiser. Sometimes I like to be discreet and just immerse myself with the things in my head. Not that im crazy about my problems, its just that, I feel peaceful being alone by treating myself with reading, sleeps, coffee and sometimes a can of beer, maybe. Hehe, don’t worry nothing like that 'Virginia tragedy' will happen, I am a good kid with a very strong faith in my religion.

When I am alone, I feel very close to God and that’s when I am able to think and get things straight. It helps me to decide anything there is to decide because I know that sometimes I tend to rush into things and ended up having another probs. So I need to relax and do things wisely. It’s not just the problems that I like to be alone, I gotta blame the gene. However, I came to realize one thing, I like to be alone too much at times that it makes it too weird, to other people.

As much as I like to be alone, I know I need to socialise more. I don’t know if I have been selfish or abandoning my friend for isolating myself too much, but what I can only explain is that being alone for a period of time is a remedy to a Happy Fellie. I love my friends, that is why I want to be happy when I am really there.

100% says they should be given a raise.. how about the performance?

Friday 3.30p.m

“Kak, boleh tak tolong sahkan dokumen-dokumen ini?”

“OK, tunggu sebentar..”

3.31pm

3.35 pm….

3.40pm …

“Er, Kak, dokumen tadi tu dah sahkan ke?”

“hmm, tunggu sebentar ye?”

3.41pm…

3.44pm..

3.51 pm…

“Er, Kak –”

“Dek, boleh tak datang isnin petang?”

“Isnin petang? Kenapa kak?”

“Semua pegawai kitorang sibuk la.”

“Tak boleh ke buat sekarang sebab dokumen tu urgent sikit kak.”

“Tak dapat la, sebab semua orang sibuk”

“Takpe la, kak. Saya sahkan sendiri.”



Well, everything needs time to settle something - I guess even to certify few documents which only requires less than 5 minutes, and now the government servants are asking for a raise? Hah, ridiculous!

(Now i know why some counters has a *divider behind it)


*something like a wall, used to cover anything behind it

a Dusun Village girl

It was stupid of me for thinking I got the calling. Well, don’t blame me, I was too stressed to weigh it up. So I called mom to get it clear of what was happening to me that night. Pity my mom I made her worried sick that she asked me to come home but I don’t see a point of going back when dad’s home can’t be a home to me anymore, well someone else reserved a different place for me, a big and luxurious golden cage that I bet no one will give a second thought of taking the offer, except for me and my sibs. Not that I was too psyched about it but that was the only choice I have to keep the family in harmony.

My bro was terminated, thanks to the ‘generous’ millionaire. But looking at the bright side, we are ready for a fight-back. Hopefully after then, happiness will be on our side. *sigh* God bless my family.

I am four months behind my work, God, I feel so nervous. So much for finishing this year huh. But I really really hope NSF will help me in getting a car. I needed it, so badly. Remind me – I need to save more and spend less.

I have to pen off now (I mean type off, in other words). I have to attend this gathering dinner at Ivan’s place. Speaking of that, all the lovely sabahans are going back to Sabah for good, it’s really sad, afraid that I will lose my Dusun-touch when they’re gone.

Well, I am always proud to be a Dusun village girl, and that’s what I am, for the bad and the good.