My contemplation on the recent events in my life

I was weighing up myself about the things that made me happy and sad. I was pondering whether I am more like a thinker or feeler ~~ I think I am both, considering the fact that I think and feel a lot.

What happened lately?

Well, Elliot Yamin is voted out this week, which is hundred percent unfair. He is GOOD. The percentage each one carries which was shown before the elimination took part reveals the proximity of the talented idols. But contemplating to the fact that Elliot Yamin lose to McPhee?? That was unbearable. OoooPss, I’m not here to proclaim that I’m an AI fanatic, it’s just a point of view from someone who followed the show since the very beginning. Even Seacrest agreed with me when he said “You’re a good man” while giving him a pat on the shoulder in front of the public at the recent show ~ Yamin is a good man ~ look at how he treats his mom, that was super sweet!!

What’s the recent hot news?

Da Vinci code. Everyone seemed to reserve themselves for those closest to them on catching the movie, and that includes me, despite having to watch it 3 days after the premiere. Even worse, we haven’t got the ticket yet. I really hope I could still get good seats tomorrow. I’ve been avoiding listening to those who’ve watched it before me, because that’s no ordinary movie and I want to enjoy it to the fullest.

How’s my love life?

Not sure how to articulate this but all I can say is it has been a winding road for both me and him. I never really liked the idea of publicizing my love life, but it has been a major issue to me lately. Thanks to love, hopes, faith and patience in me, which helped me to go on with sturdy endurance. I think it’s better to leave it in serenity and let it fix itself. I’ve gone to this path and chosen it way over. Nevertheless, this relationship really helped me to reflect on myself as a whole and reveals the hidden attributes I long have. It helped me to become a better person, and that’s what matter the most though somehow I wish it could be easier, but God has a bigger plan and I am sure He knows what’s best for me and him.

What makes me happy?

Hmmm, what more than to imagine a perfect morning, perfect afternoon, and perfect evening to spend. Read the above to find out.

Happiness requires maintenance

Memories hit me again. It hurts so much when you realize you’ve lost a lot after you’ve thrown it all away the last time. You thought you’ve got it all cover up for you, and that it’s easy for you to go on. You think you are the superhero now – BUT ONLY TO FIND OUT, YOU SCREWED UP EVERYTHING U’VE GOT IN THE PAST!! Now, are you a superhero? Or a super loser? It hurts.

It’s hard to disclose the fact that you regret the things you’ve done. Throwing away the entire thing you loved the most. I thought happiness is accessible and it stays forever. But Happiness is all about maintenance. If you fail to maintain it, then it will all come crashing down.

I really hope Badminton will help this time.

Another bad day... hopefully It's just one of those P.M.S

“you had a bad day”

That’s the remark Daniel Powter would ever give to me for this dreadfully pathetic life which im having at this circle of time.

I dunno why it’s seemed so hard to put one thing down flawlessly. As what my friend would say to me over and over again that I have to try harder. Man, the thing is, it’s just too hard to handle, expecially when you’re so wedged in between like a sandwich.

I am a whiner… okay, big time. Im getting my visitor late this month, im not sure what has gone wrong with my hormone or what I would say in a perfect manner, the lifecycle of my very alive ovum confused me and 'she' is still pestering around in there. (Hey, it’s time for you to leave and meet the world!!) Is that a polite way to put it? Whatever it is, I expect you to open you mind a bit wider and dun pucker your brow just yet, that’s the last thing I need right now, people.

I need to breathe, at the very least.

Speaking of breathing, thanks to our Badminton sessions for helping me with my breathing these days. I don’t have to go through those terrible nights anymore for not being able to breathe properly, as though the nights had turned into a heaven for me. I still have sleepless nights though and reading helped a lot to fix my system.

However, I have to thank God Almighty for blessing me with such angelic friends around who’ve been there for me during my dark hours. Without them, I think im nothing but a tail of a pig. Hmmm, you know what I mean.

my new haircut

Front view

Side view

I just got myself a new haircut. Because of the fuss I gave to the stylist in Indah Parade, Sri Petaling, my hair was kind of short at the front and I have to put them down to cover my forehead so the mistake won’t be that obvious. Here are some of the pictures that shows my beautiful new hairdo which only last for a day. The next day, it just plunge to its true color. I know, I know, it’s hard to look beautiful.

Anyways, I had a blast on last Saturday, not knowing that it put me down to fever for days. Serve me right!! Even Badminton can’t help. I have to remind myself every time that drinking is bad, bad! When Tharmaindra found out about it was the drinking that got me almost a high fever, I know he won’t let me drink again. Well, never mind – I can LIVE without drinking anyways. Suzie, my lovely cousin, was just amazing that night, i knew for long that she gonna win it but i just kept it to myself, not letting myself be over-confident. The competition was tough as all the contestants were really good. But, to everybody's amazement, she won the first prize. I would like to share some of the pictures which were taken that night, using my very own 6260 Nokia. But i just couldn't upload it to this page. weird. Never mind. i'll try again later.

My head is still spinning, but hopefully it will be okay by tonight. Well, I have to since I’m meeting a sweetheart tomorrow. I did everything to recover myself. Bought panadol (soluble), lemon, honey etc. Porridge and hot chicken soup are now my lunch and dinner. Not forgetting, waking up every 10 minutes for nature call and gulping a glass of water. The past few days were horrible for me. But i now my effort will be paid off by tomorrow. Can't wait to be healthy again.

One Moment in my lab

Amazingly I woke up early this morning and did my laundry before going to UKM again. It’s Saturday, it means, “waking up late” for the students. In fact, it’s their exam week and I suppose they’ve been burning the midnight oil the night before. My housemate was dead sleeping when I left the house. It’s almost tiring to wait for the bus, but the walking is worse since I have to walk from the bus stop outside, pass through few buildings to reach my faculty. My back is hurting now for walking so long and the sun is giving an extra burden.

I just finished my lab work, and the hallway outside my lab is a bit eerie since there is no one around. To be calculative, I think there are only Bee Eik, a master student next door and myself in the building. She just left the building about a minute ago and now im alone in the stillness of the surroundings. I think it’s a bad idea to stay long here. I am going to the student building in any moment now after I get a reply from Dr Brid. It’s really funny to communicate through email but we have no choice since it took us long to get an SMS from each other. She is using her homeland’s phone line and I believe Ireland is farrrrrrrrr away from here.

Anyway, I just received her email after sending her one 5 minutes ago. This is neat, in a way. I am meeting her few minutes from now. It’s time to wrap up. Adios…

Thinking and worrying too much?? - IGNORE laaa!!

The focal problem im having for the past few days is – Thinking and worrying too much. Ive been expecting too much and now it’s making me really down. I came home early today right after I finished preparing my inoculum. I thought my idea would work that I could use the incubator we have in the lab but only to find out that it wasn’t good enough for instant bacteria growth. It’s really another disappointment for me this week. So I cancelled on my hourly OD reading for tonight and now I have to monitor the growth for a week, which is a hassle when I can get results in one night. Ooops, correction there… I dun mind the hassle; it’s just that, I need to get result before Dr.Brid leaves Malaysia. It’s not easy having discussion through email or even instant message. *sigh*

I really hope I didn’t miss Dr.Brid today. It’s her busy week. I know I should be waiting in the lab, in case she might drop by before going off again. *sigh*

I came home and slept the whole afternoon, trying to get rid of the overwhelming frustration. It’s good to ignore our problems sometime because thinking and worrying too much won’t help!! It’s dinnertime now, and that means eating alone again (As though I’m not accustomed to that!)

Oh well, my SMS is working again. At least there’s something to be happy about today.

Life is a challenge, and thank goodness im not giving up…. Just yet!