Act of contrition

Thanks for being honest eechi, and dont worry im not hiding myself here because i know where i stand and i am not here to defense myself anymore...

To be honest, when I read ur comment eechi, I feel like deleting it immediately because it was too much to take but deleting it will only means I am hiding it, and it’s only fair to let it stay published since I have wrote about you guys too. I remind myself it is not wrong to face the charge and let everyone know what really happened and what kind of person I am… now I really don’t mind if people starts to judge me because I have let go all my anger and my disappointments for the last events and I am willing to put down my sword for peace… I really want to make it up, lay the cards on the table (listen to you all and explain things), not to defense myself but to reach the understanding between each other so we can make peace and be friends again… but I guess it may not happen since I don’t have much time here in KK.

Ive tried to make you all understand but i guess the damage is beyond repair, so there's not much i can say to fix it.. i admit it's very immature of me to even publicize the previous post as well, (i was warned) but it's the only way to reach to you girls..

I am sorry that i have judged you and Jo (saying that you are all being immature and are still the same) but as far as i remember i haven't really badmouthed you guys.. there is one stage of life where i want to reach out to you girls but i just couldn't because i was too scared that i will be misjudged since I have broken up with Chris.. i was really sensitive about everything that time and maybe words slipped out from my mouth out of frustration..but honestly eechi, i have never talked bad about you, especially you.. well again, i sound defensive..

i really duno what to say... i duno why i din sms you all that day, i cant remember.. the only thing i remember is i was also confused that day and i thought u understand how demanding my sister can be.. my sister!! i sacrificed a lot for her and even got a D in my Bio and the rest is C back in UMS just to take responsibilities at home... but none of that matter now.. i know i should have sms you guys, that was my mistake..

and maybe ive put my family too much priorities that ive forgotten abt you all that day... i know i was selfish.. I can see it though that time I din realize it that way.

well, let's put it behind us eechi... let's just move on with life... it's my bad that the friendship is broken... if we can't be friends anymore, it's ok eechi. i know whatever i say here will only make things worse... i really duno what to do so i will leave it to this dot chi..

what i can say here is... i am sorry for everything that happened.. it's not my nature to bow down this much except when i really want to fix something, you know me well, my pride is too high to be degraded (not easy for me to say sorry) but ive put it off hundred percent and went all out for this, but i think this is the best i can do...just let time heal, let God decide..

There will be a lot of my friends reading this, but it doesn’t matter if I will be judged or not… it doesn’t matter anymore that my pride is taken away.. all I know is, when I say sorry, I was really really sorry, and I was really sincere and I meant it so much…

I am here to admit all the mistakes I have done, I was hoping that you girls will try to accept and understand each other again.. im not pointing fingers here as I have done a lot myself to damage the friendship, just to fix my farking life.. it has taken a lot of me to do this.. and please understand that I am not trying to show my inocence here and making you all the bad guy, I am here to ask for forgiveness…. and I really really really hope that this time you guys will understand my intention for being sorry and forgiveness is all I ask...

again, I am sorry for everything… now I am almost at the stage where my life is stable and happy. I have accepted whatever your (and the rest) anger towards me… maybe this post will re-ignite the anger again, I really really duno what else to do to make it okay because I have given everything that I have in me to fix this and hopefully my heartfelt apology is heard..